{ Bare }

It's Five Minute Friday over at Tales of a Gypsy Mama, and I'm joining in!

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I don't know what it is about exhaustion that makes me feel so exposed, so vulnerable--like my heart and soul are hanging naked in the public courtyard. Like all the worst parts of me are on display. Like sin I thought was being put to death by the Spirit is very much alive.

 

Today I can barely keep my eyes open. Between the little tooth shoving its way through Elaina's gums, and my decision {brilliant? insane?} to stop swaddling her since she's already not sleeping well--two birds with one stone, ya know--I haven't gotten much sleep lately. And yet, for some reason, this time around the soul-baring tiredness isn't so ugly.

 

This morning I rocked Lainie to sleep half a dozen times, nearly falling asleep myself. She kept pulling her pacifier out and then wailing in sorrow as she held it between her chubby fingers. And I relished it: the baby smell of her head, her little sleepy-snorey noises, the warmth of her hand rubbing my neck in her sleep. The bare-ness is good today: In it, I am knowing my Jesus and my daughter more deeply.