{ Slices of Summer, Part II }

:: Family date after church ~ ferry ride to Kingston ::

:: Fascinated by the wake ::

:: She ALWAYS gets this distracted by airplanes--she loves 'em! ::

 

~*~*~

:: A recent date night {date date night} included a trip to Fainting Goat Gelato ::

:: Mike had mango habanero and raspberry, I had lemon grisbi and honey lavender ~ so delicious! ::

 

~*~*~

 

:: Baby loves milkshakes, too ::

 

~*~*~

:: Who knew this face happens when you put her in a leotard with rhinestones and a tulle skirt? ::

:: Or this pose... ::

:: Or that our little photoshoot would end in such sorrow! ::

 

~*~*~

 

:: Saturday stroll with Daddy ::

:: "I heard a boat! Or an airplane! OVER THERE!" ::

 

Summer's not over yet, but this post is plenty long!

{ Jellybean }

Since I am 17 weeks pregnant--almost halfway there!--I guess it's high time I did a little pregnancy update.

This pregnancy has been so very different than my first: Perhaps most noticeably, I've only thrown up six or seven times...total. This, people, is phenomenal and wonderful and most unexpected and the BIGGEST blessing ever!! With Lainie, I threw up two or three times a day up until 14 weeks.  Basically, if I was awake, I was nauseous. I fully expected that with #2. This time, I've still been nauseous a lot {though much less than with Lainie}, and I've only puked a few times. But now at 17 weeks, I still have periods of nausea that I don't remember having at this stage with #1. Brushing my teeth makes me gag every time, and sometimes a little cough sends me into a spell of dry heaving. I think I'm finally over the "ohmygosh I could sleep standing up, every day, at any time of day, no matter how much sleep I've gotten!!" weeks. Growing a baby is an amazing experience, a privilege I hope that I don't take for granted or skim over in the midst of these "light and momentary" physical afflictions that come along with a human being growing inside me.

How far along: 17ish weeks

Weight gain: In the normal range...but I think I'm gaining faster than I did with Lainie. Probably because I didn't spend the first 14 weeks barfing.

Belly: Unfortunately the "baby belly" still looks exactly the same as the "I eat too much and have never done a sit-up belly." I've definitely lost my waist and have a little poochy tummy, but it doesn't look like a pregnant tummy yet. Just a fat one. I can't easily cross my arms when I'm sitting down, either--it's uncomfortable to lay them across my belly.

Baby size: About five inches, head to bottom, and about five ounces. The size of an onion...the weight of a turnip...the length of an iPhone...take your pick!

Sleep: Started using a pillow between my knees/under my tummy a week or so ago, and it makes sleeping so much more comfortable! Again, I feel like I was further along in my pregnancy with Lainie before I needed pillows to help me sleep...and what's this nonsense about waking up twice a night to pee? Already? Really, Jellybean? You only weigh five ounces and you jump on my bladder at night...

Clothes: Thanks to the fact that a lot of my wardrobe consists of stretchy skirts, dresses, and leggings, I'm still in my regular clothes 95% of the time, though the stack that doesn't fit anymore is growing rapidly. And I have to confess: I haven't worn jeans in weeks, and most of my shorts are un-buttonable. So really, when I say "regular clothes," I mean regular stretchy/non-jeans clothes. I got out my maternity clothes last week because I was desperate for some new shirts, but I'm waiting as long as possible to wear them...those few tops and one pair of jeans will get old really fast!

Movement: I first felt Jellybean move at 15 weeks. {I didn't feel Lainie until 18 weeks.} As with Lainie, I spent a few days thinking, Is that gas or Jellybean?, but once I was sure it was Jellybean, I realized that most of those flutters and pops I'd felt earlier were not gas. ;-)

Exercise: Ummmm.....this week I went on a walk with a girlfriend that involved pushing Lainie in a stroller up a mountain, but other than that, not much.

Wedding rings on or off: On. {My fingers didn't swell much 'til about the last month with Lainie.}

How am I doing mentally and emotionally: This week I've had a couple episodes of momentary panic when I've realized I'm almost halfway through this pregnancy and we haven't done anything baby-related. I haven't given a thought to any kind of additional gear we will need {like a second crib--helloooo!--or a toddler carseat for Lainie}, or birth prep {do I want to try hypnobirth again?}. Are we totally underpreparing ourselves for this baby, because we're so busy and hey, we've done this before? Or am I just less OCD than I was the first time? A few people have asked me, too, if I'm nervous or worried that this baby will be ok, given that Lainie had a diaphragmatic hernia. Jesus has given me complete peace about this baby, and up until a week or two ago, I could honestly say I had not been worried at all about this baby's health. Then I had a couple days of being sure that some serious anomaly is going to be found on the ultrasound. I spent a lot of time crying out to Jesus for peace, and He met me really sweetly. It's hard to describe--it's not an assurance that this baby will be healthy, though truthfully my fears are gone and I do believe he or she will be healthy. It's an assurance that goes deeper: that if this baby does have any health problems, Jesus will be with us there too. He can, and will, totally redeem that kind of situation if it happens.

Looking forward to: Actually looking pregnant instead of like I just eat too much dessert.

Best moment this week: Seeing Lainie learn to walk--her skill, and even more obviously her confidence, are growing rapidly! The past couple of days she has even walked away from me, toward an object--a big deal for her when she usually walks from one person to another.

Food aversions: None really...I'm still not a huge fan of meat that I've prepared, though.

Food cravings: Fresh fruit {it's all I've wanted through this pregnancy}. Grinders from Portofino. Chocolate milk.

What I miss: Sleeping through the night. Not being tired all the time. {I mean all.the.time. Most days I sleep during part or all of Lainie's morning nap--I am seriously a snoozing machine.} Having a nice drink when we go on dates. Not gagging when I brush my teeth. Having energy to do things besides activities of daily life.

And then I remind myself: It's ok that I don't have energy, that I'm not doing XYZ. I'm growing a baby! THAT is a big deal!!

:: Weeks 4, 5, 8, and 10 ::

:: Weeks 13, 14, 15, and 16 ::

:: Week 17 ::

 

{Last week a friend commented that I wear a lot of stripes, which I agreed with...but until I looked through these photos today, I didn't realize the extent to which I wear "a lot" of stripes. Whoa Nelly!}

{ Slices of Summer, Part I }

I've been sporadic in my blogging this summer, preferring to spend Lainie's naptimes snoozing myself. Here is some photographic evidence of what we've been up to this summer.

 

 

:: playing at the park ::

 

:: playdate with Violet, my former coworker's daughter who is 22 days older than Lainie ::

 

:: Lainie's first gyro, on our way to the Washington coast in June--yum! ::

 

:: At the local farmer's market, slightly worried about how cold her first ice cream bar is! ::

 

:: Date with Mr. Mike...you know it's good when it ends with gelato :-D ::

 

:: She really wanted this trike from a consignment store. {Doesn't her expression look like she's thinking about how she can convince me to buy it?!} ::

 

:: Very serious about occupying this chair at the coffee shop ::

 

:: She's really into putting things on her head/neck lately. Good thing this was a clean diaper. ::

 

:: Playing in the dishwasher ::

 

:: On this particular afternoon at the pool, she preferred wearing her {new} flip flops and eating goldfish crackers to getting in the water. By the way, goldfish crackers are her new obsession. ::

 

:: Ahhhhh....the day she discovered Daddy's sneakers! ::

 

:: Chillin' on a park bench ::

 

:: Lainie absolutely glows when she is in a swing: the biggest grin, belly laughs--she just sparkles. Of course, when I stop the swing to get a non-blurry photo, she gets all serious. ::

 

:: What? You don't practice the splits after your baths? Why ever not? It's the perfect time--you're all warm and limbered up! ::

{ Swimmin' }

This kid...she loves the water.

 

We have access to three pools at our condo complex, but we had never ever dipped so much as a toe in any of them--until this summer. Auntie Amaryah gave Lainie the cutest {ohmygosh it is SO CUTE} bathing suit for her birthday, and I bought her a little kiddie float thingamajig, and one day I took her to the closest pool.

 

She wasn't scared, even a little bit.  We've become regular visitors, us two lily-white girls both with cute little poochy tummies, and sometimes we even drag Daddy {or Grandma, when she was visiting for Amaryah's wedding} to the pool with us.

 

 

:: DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN ABOUT THE CUTE SUIT ::

 

 

:: Sometimes...you just need to take a rest. ::

 

:: with Grandma ::

 

It's amazing to me how much Lainie enjoys being in the water. I'm a doggie-paddler, not a swimmer...so it's safe to say Lainie got this trait from her daddy. ;-) She's happy to hang out in her float, or in my arms. She loves to chase her ball around, but most of all she likes to watch other kids in the pool. Sometimes when I'm holding her, she stretches out on her tummy and kicks her legs. And after awhile, she points to the steps and we get out and walk back to our chair and she eats snacks and then she usually wants to walk around and explore for awhile...and then of course, it's time to get back in the water. I didn't realize how much of a water baby she is until I saw other babies her age who don't like being in the pool at all.

 

But don't you worry, Aunt Amaryah. That bathing suit is getting lots of use.

{ Five Minute Friday: Lonely }

I'm participating in Five Minute Friday again this week. Today's prompt: Lonely.

Go!

Mothering, it can be lonely work.

In the first year especially--that's all that I know from personal experience--so much of it is solitary. The nursing, the diaper changing, the rocking to sleep, the middle-of-the-night crying or feeding or seemingly endless soothing, the three-hour "please-go-to-sleep-tonight" marathons. The unseen hours of preparation for what used to be a mindless outing--grocery shopping, for example. The tummy time and the board books and the days at home stretching on endless because a little one needs her naps, but won't sleep unless she's in her own crib.

It's lonely. It's easy to fall into the trap of "it's easier to just stay at home, so I will." It's easy to think that you are the only one who feels like she's walking through waist-deep molasses as you mother a helpless little person.

I feel like I'm finally emerging from this phase, which was compounded by the fact that I'm quite the homebody and prefer quiet days at home anyway. But little girl no longer relies on her naps quite so much, and getting out isn't as draining a production as it was the first few months. I feel like I am tentatively venturing out into the realm of regular society again, only to realize that in a few short months I'll be starting the cycle all over again.

Only this time, I have the benefit of experience. Of knowing it doesn't have to be solitary. I think this time around, I'll choose a few more of those draining, exhausting, "why on earth did I ever leave home in the first place?!!" excursions. Because mamas don't need to be lonely.

{ Five Minute Friday: Story }

Linking up with Lisa-Jo for this week's Five Minute Friday. The prompt: Story.

Go!

~*~*~

Most days I live like I'm the author. This is my story, my plot; these are my characters, and there are very specific ways I want all those variables to play out.

The truth, which I usually forget, is that I am a character--specifically, that Jesus is the Author, this is His story, and I am a character in the greatest plot ever to unfold: That of Jesus' redemption of humankind. I know that truth in my head, but I don't live it in my day to day moments. Hence, the frustration when characters and plots and things don't work out the way I'd envisioned.

Is it possible to not only acknowledge, but to be grateful--to rejoice!--in the sure knowledge that this isn't my story? That things are never going to work out as I imagine? That this life isn't all about me? Is it possible to be thankful instead of annoyed and frustrated when my baby wakes up with a stuffy nose and needs me more than usual--when I was expecting to get loads of paperwork and ironing done today? Will I choose to say "thank you, Jesus" for whatever He gives--because He is the Author, and He alone knows how my bit in this works together with all the other billions of stories He's weaving together on this planet?

Thank you, Jesus, that my life is secure in Your hands.

{ of weddings }

Mike's sister Amaryah married her Lawrence on July 20, two days after our fourth wedding anniversary.

In true pregnancy-brain fashion {or is this just a sign that we're slowly exiting the "honeymoon/take-a-photo-of-every-milestone" phase?}, I didn't take a single picture on our anniversary outing. My mom was in town, so she watched Lainie while Mike and I went to my first midwife appointment. We got to hear Jellybean's heartbeat for the first time, which was sweet, and then we had dinner at a restaurant on the marina. We came home and ate ice cream while watching Downton Abbey with mom. I joke that we've transitioned from traveling to islands to celebrate our marriage {Honeymoon: Oahu. First anniversary: Lopez Island. Second anniversary: Kauai.}...to going to medical appointments for our children {Third anniversary: Lainie's last surgical follow-up appointment at Children's Hospital. Fourth anniversary: Jellybean's first midwife appointment.}.

There are, however, some decent photos of us from Amaryah's wedding two days later. That'll do, right?

Amaryah + Lawrence had a beautiful wedding, one of the loveliest I've seen. The ceremony and reception were outdoors, and the weather was gorgeous. So was the bride!

 

 

:: the reception area ::

 

 

 

:: the ceremony area ::

 

:: the whole family ::

 

:: exquisite centerpieces! ::

 

 

:: lace mounted on embroidery hoops, hung above the dance floor ::

 

 

:: Mike and I did this...a lot...all evening. Baby girl wants to walk everywhere. ::

{Side note: I can't decide how I feel about the fact that I comfortably wore a maternity dress at 12 weeks pregnant.}

 

 

:: three generations ::

 

 

:: all the food was miniature and SO delicious--but between feeding Lainie and myself, I only got a photo of the tiny burger. ::

 

 

:: lots of fun lawn games, which Lainie thoroughly enjoyed ::

 

:: ignore my freaky blurry hand...I love this photo of Lainie. ::

 

 

:: first dance ::

 

 

:: I kid you not--beneath that crazy red wig lies my husband. ::

 

 

:: Mike and Amaryah dancing with Estella, their cousin's daughter ::

 

It was such a lovely wedding celebration. Retrospectively I am totally a first-time mom, taking far more photos of my cute little baby than of the bride and groom and wedding festivities! All the more reason to look forward to the professional photos, right? And I'm sad not to have any pictures of the ceremony, but since we were sitting in the front row, I was completely occupied keeping Lainie quiet and happy. {Consumed by Lainie--just during the short ceremony: Two pouches of baby food, cheerios, part of a lollipop, and various sips from one water bottle and one sippy cup.} She was a little angel...a very hungry little angel, apparently...until the very end, when the pastor was doing the "by the power vested in me..." formalities just before pronouncing them husband and wife. At that precise moment, Lainie set down her lollipop and yelled, "BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH!" You have to admit, her timing was impeccable!

 

We are so thankful that my mom came over for the weekend specifically to help with Lainie during the wedding and reception. Partway through the reception, she took Lainie home and put her to bed. Mike and I were able to dance and par-tay and enjoy the rest of the reception without trying to entertain a very tired little girl, which was a huge blessing. Thanks, mom!!

 

What a difference four years make. When I think back on our wedding, I want to blurt out, "You were such a kid!!" We both were--not that we're terribly mature and grown-up now, but it's just crazy how much has changed since then. How much we have changed. In good ways. Marriage does grow you up. Having a child does grow you up. And while I was all misty-eyed over the wonder of Lawrence and Amaryah starting their journey as husband and wife, I am speechlessly amazed at what God has done/is doing in my own marriage. How He continues to grow us together. Continues to grow and deepen, mature and solidify and strengthen a love that I thought was pretty amazing when we said "I do" in 2009.

 

I used to be afraid of losing the butterflies-in-the-stomach, crazy-in-love inloveness of newlyweds. Everybody is, don't you think? Afraid that if it goes away, you'll be left with nothing...certain that the only other option is a lifetime of boring staleness, looking back with longing on that mythical "honeymoon phase." That is such a lie. SUCH a lie. Being newlyweds is great, and I loved that season, and every newlywed should soak it up! But the love that grows from that...after that...is a beautiful, sacred, breathtaking thing too. Love isn't static. It isn't something you achieve and then struggle to protect and maintain as-is. With Jesus at the center of a marriage, love constantly grows and changes and becomes deeper and more beautiful. It's not all sunshine and roses {or rainbows and unicorns, as Mike would say}. It's not all easy. But it is so rich. And I am so thankful for the four years I've had the great privilege of being Mrs. Mike.